What are allergy health issues and what are normal childhood ailments? This is a question I constantly ask myself and it can be a real balancing act.
We have just spent the last two days in a medical whirlwind, trying to establish whether my daughters mouth breathing is being caused my her allergies or by a structural issue in her nasal passage. Caution needs to be taken every step of the way, as normal ailments which all kids experience can easily be overlooked, whilst we deal with the many confronting aspects of our children's allergy responses.
Reflecting on what is needed:-
1) Have an allergist you trust and who has a long term investment in your child and who is not worried about spending time with you to discuss various issues. (without is costing you per minute) We have two, plus an amazingly well informed dietician.
2) Keep reading over your allergy information, it is easy to assume you know it all about your child and you can easily overlook very simple but crucial pieces of information.
3) Keep a medical diary, recording illnesses, ailments, weather conditions, treatments. This is a great way of collating information which informs the medical profession and also your allergy management approach.
4) Review the medical information, as children grow their condition changes, at least annual follow up with the allergist with updates from the medical diary are always useful. Also check with medical specialists that the way your children are taking their medication is still effective. e.g. the size of spacers change as they grow from toddler to adolescent.
5) I have this great friend who has been on our allergy journey from the start she knows the whole picture and has held my hand through some of the toughest times. It is wonderful having a friend who you can rant and rave to about the issues you need to deal with and they get it, without you needing to spell everything out.
6) Try and keep a balanced view, all parents have to deal with medical issues with their children, we just have a few more.
7) Create space and time with your child to discuss why you have to go and see specialists, the purpose of blood tests, and acknowledge that it may seem unfair, whilst keeping a realistic stance that it is part of "life". There are no one off blood tests, allergy tests etc for our kids it is something that they have to learn to get used to, which is hard but a reality.
8) Make sure you give yourself space and time to process allergy appointments. A lot of information is normally given and normally within a medical setting. This can take its toll and it is worth ensuring that you acknowledge this for your and your child. Do something nice together to celebrate that the appointment is behind you. Again check in with your child their perspective of the appointment to ensure they are not left with any inaccurate information.
8) Last but not least, maintain a sense of humour! It is hard at times but in most situations there really is something to laugh at!
I am sure i've left some information out, but this is all for now.......
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Education and Changing Attitudes
This week seems to be throwing up some interesting issues, which have taken up some head and emotional space.
Our local indoor playground (0-6 yrs) has decided that it is OK to serve peanut butter to children as long as no children with allergies are present. They consider this OK as they will endeavour to supervise the children and get them to use wet wipes afterwards. Trying hard to see the positives in this decision leads me to consider that at least they are prepared to consider food allergy management even if it is a little misguided! Here is an opportunity to provide some accurate information about the "risks" associated with such actions..... So I shall be putting pen to paper and seeing what kind of response I get, before taking a slightly more proactive approach. Watch this space........
The second challenge of the week involves a parent who seems to be challenged by the issues of cross contamination. Not wanting to bore you with the details, I should just say that some people have absolutely no idea about how to keep kids with allergies safe. What is more concerning is that they go out of their way to actively dismiss advice or information.
These incidences highlight the importance of picking your battles and being clear about the long term goal. There is no point ranting and raving about the injustices of situations or getting upset about insensitiveness of individuals.
I'm trying really hard to see what these incidences provide me in terms of 'opportunities'?
How can I ensure that my local indoor playground space is safe for kids with allergies and in particular my kids.
Secondly and most importantly how can I more actively communicate these issues within the community to ensure my daughters safety. The incident with the parent provides me with an excellent opportunity to engage in a further discussion about cross contamination issues within the school environment. If managed correctly it will improve my daughters safety at school and also hopefully enable her to purchase items form the canteen in the future.
Each challenge provides new opportunities, the trick is to let go of the steam/anger/frustration and overall emotion and try really hard to grasp a positive spin on the situation. Seeing it as an opportunity to propel me to the next challenge, which undoubtably will only be around the corner:)
None of this would be possible without the friendship and amazing support of friends who have been there before and who have experienced the many challenges we as parents of kids with allergies face daily. So my since gratitude and appreciation goes out to my friends who provide me with the much needed space and shoulder to cry on when needed. Without you it would be hard to keep such a positive spin - Thank you:)xx
Our local indoor playground (0-6 yrs) has decided that it is OK to serve peanut butter to children as long as no children with allergies are present. They consider this OK as they will endeavour to supervise the children and get them to use wet wipes afterwards. Trying hard to see the positives in this decision leads me to consider that at least they are prepared to consider food allergy management even if it is a little misguided! Here is an opportunity to provide some accurate information about the "risks" associated with such actions..... So I shall be putting pen to paper and seeing what kind of response I get, before taking a slightly more proactive approach. Watch this space........
The second challenge of the week involves a parent who seems to be challenged by the issues of cross contamination. Not wanting to bore you with the details, I should just say that some people have absolutely no idea about how to keep kids with allergies safe. What is more concerning is that they go out of their way to actively dismiss advice or information.
These incidences highlight the importance of picking your battles and being clear about the long term goal. There is no point ranting and raving about the injustices of situations or getting upset about insensitiveness of individuals.
I'm trying really hard to see what these incidences provide me in terms of 'opportunities'?
How can I ensure that my local indoor playground space is safe for kids with allergies and in particular my kids.
Secondly and most importantly how can I more actively communicate these issues within the community to ensure my daughters safety. The incident with the parent provides me with an excellent opportunity to engage in a further discussion about cross contamination issues within the school environment. If managed correctly it will improve my daughters safety at school and also hopefully enable her to purchase items form the canteen in the future.
Each challenge provides new opportunities, the trick is to let go of the steam/anger/frustration and overall emotion and try really hard to grasp a positive spin on the situation. Seeing it as an opportunity to propel me to the next challenge, which undoubtably will only be around the corner:)
None of this would be possible without the friendship and amazing support of friends who have been there before and who have experienced the many challenges we as parents of kids with allergies face daily. So my since gratitude and appreciation goes out to my friends who provide me with the much needed space and shoulder to cry on when needed. Without you it would be hard to keep such a positive spin - Thank you:)xx
Monday, February 14, 2011
Sharing the Info
Whilst talking with a friend today about my party experience, she came up with a great suggestion to deal with the many questions parents love to ask me about allergies. Why not ask "why are you interested", obviously I wouldn't do this in an accusatory way, but more as a way of finding out why they are interested. It might just make them think twice about their own reasoning and make them a little more hesitant to ask more, if they are not really that interested.
It also made me consider having a stash of leaflets about allergies and anaphylaxis on me, so for those that did seem genuinely interested, I could give them one which would hopefully encourage them to find out more.
It really is a fine balance between wanting to educate others around allergy issues and just wanting to be a parent like any other, enjoying a party with my children.
As written in my previous blog it is a hard enough activity to do with my kids without feeling as if I have to field multiple questions. Some of the questions and honest answers are conversations my children should not be exposed to!
It also made me consider having a stash of leaflets about allergies and anaphylaxis on me, so for those that did seem genuinely interested, I could give them one which would hopefully encourage them to find out more.
It really is a fine balance between wanting to educate others around allergy issues and just wanting to be a parent like any other, enjoying a party with my children.
As written in my previous blog it is a hard enough activity to do with my kids without feeling as if I have to field multiple questions. Some of the questions and honest answers are conversations my children should not be exposed to!
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Let's party!
I've been meaning to set up this blog for far too long and here I am finally and wondering were I should begin???
I guess in the NOW is always a good place to begin......
Today we attended yet another birthday party, something the average parent does without too much thought but for us, this is an event which fills me with way too much stress and unfortunately dread! I'm in search for advice on ways to manage these events not only on a practical level (as i am not a domestic goddess in the kitchen) but also on an emotional level......
Am I the only one that builds these events into stress atoms, days before I build myself into a ridiculous state of neurosis, worrying about what food I will take, how we will cope, what issues we will have to deal with and how best I can ensure the kids have an exciting time! I exhaust myself. The family have to cope with me in a whirlwind of emotion, watching me at work in the kitchen making party creations often minutes before walking out the door. As I am often in complete denial that we are even going to a party in the first place.
We arrive at party and I turn into a social queen chatting and laughing and answering the array of questions about allergies and food intolerance etc. Whilst gently ensuring the kids are safe and enjoying themselves. Inside I often find myself retreating emotionally and feeling regret that my kids cannot indulge in the party food ritual that other kids do. It must feel so isolating for them, although few words are expressed by them, the look or quick glance at the tasty birthday cake speaks volumes, and I wonder............
We get home all tried and played out and I pour myself a cup of tea and think, i wonder how long it will be before we get another party invitation?
I guess in the NOW is always a good place to begin......
Today we attended yet another birthday party, something the average parent does without too much thought but for us, this is an event which fills me with way too much stress and unfortunately dread! I'm in search for advice on ways to manage these events not only on a practical level (as i am not a domestic goddess in the kitchen) but also on an emotional level......
Am I the only one that builds these events into stress atoms, days before I build myself into a ridiculous state of neurosis, worrying about what food I will take, how we will cope, what issues we will have to deal with and how best I can ensure the kids have an exciting time! I exhaust myself. The family have to cope with me in a whirlwind of emotion, watching me at work in the kitchen making party creations often minutes before walking out the door. As I am often in complete denial that we are even going to a party in the first place.
We arrive at party and I turn into a social queen chatting and laughing and answering the array of questions about allergies and food intolerance etc. Whilst gently ensuring the kids are safe and enjoying themselves. Inside I often find myself retreating emotionally and feeling regret that my kids cannot indulge in the party food ritual that other kids do. It must feel so isolating for them, although few words are expressed by them, the look or quick glance at the tasty birthday cake speaks volumes, and I wonder............
We get home all tried and played out and I pour myself a cup of tea and think, i wonder how long it will be before we get another party invitation?
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